Archive for Relationships
“Solstice” comes from two Latin words: sol meaning “sun” and sistere meaning “to stand still” because it appeared as though the sun and moon had stopped moving across the sky. This
longest night of the year, followed by a renewal of the sun, demonstrates the cyclical order of the cosmos. In this way, celebrating the solstice can be a beautiful remembrance that our lives are part of a larger order, always changing, always renewing.
If we look around us we can see that the rest of nature has quieted down, slowed down, or at least taken its activity underground into its roots or burrows. Since we are a part of nature, So this is the gift of the season: a pause to appreciate and to nurture our roots, our connections that support us so well all year long.
A couple of suggestions for rituals for the winter solstice
- Make a Christmas wreath which is an ancient tradition made of evergreens, holly, and ivy. The wreath’s circle symbolizes the wheel of the year and the completion of another cycle.
- Light a candle on the solstice and shine the light and reflect and meditate on your teachings and wisdom from the year gone by.
- Cleanse your home with some sage or bells.
- Cleanse your own energy field with some sage, rose water, or a nice cleansing salt bath
- Decorating the tree with objects resembling fruits, nuts, berries, to acknowledge
- the gifts of abundance from Mother eart
Feng Shui is all about having the most supportive, inspiring and healthiest home. One of the first steps to achieving these Feng Shui goals is to give your home a really good cleaning. But because Feng Shui also means living in harmony with the earth, your cleaning should use natural organic products that honor and nurture that relationship.
Using natural home cleaning products supports the sense of smell. Many cleaning products include natural essential oils, and thus will make your home smell nice by offering an “aromatherapy” effect. Lavender is a natural disinfectant. Imagine getting your home clean while enjoying that beautiful relaxing aroma. You can even add a few drops to your clothes before they go into the dryer or a few drops in the vacuum.
Lemon is another magical essential oil. You can use a few drops on stains on your clothes, or add a few drops to a gallon of water when mopping your white tile floors.
Tea tree essential oil offers antibacterial, antiseptic and antifungal properties. It works especially well to get rid of mildew and mold around the house.
By contrast, bleach and other chemicals in non-natural cleaning products can create smells and even toxic odors that are unbearable.
Simple Ingredients needed for making your own cleaning products include:
- Baking soda
- Citrus seed extract: Usually made from grapefruit seed, this natural preservative is a powerful antimicrobial agent. It is often sold as grapefruit seed extract
- Essential oils: lavender, sweet orange; bergamot, rosemary, eucalyptus or tea tree; thyme; lemon or lemongrass; and peppermint or citronella
- Cider Vinegar
And here are some great recipes for making your own natural cleaning products:
All purpose cleaner
9 parts water to 1 part white vinegar
For the Bathroo
10 drops of tea tree oil and three cups of white vinegar. Add to your toilet bowl and let sit for 15 minutes.
Fill a spray bottle with half water and half vinegar for a shower or bathtub cleaner. leave for 30 minutes before rinsing off.
Mix two cups water, 1/2 cup white or cider vinegar, and 1 to 2 drops of lemon essential oil.
Tile Grout Cleaner
Mix 1 part water and 3 parts baking soda mixed into a paste. Apply to grout and let sit; and then scrub.
Use sea salt with a little lemon juice or essential oil and scrub. Also, try baking soda and water made into a paste.
If you decide to purchase natural cleaning products instead of making them at home, there are just a couple of qualities to look out for:
- Fragrance free
- Reduced and recyclable packaging
- No VOCs
- Pesticide Free
Feng Shui principals are becoming so widespread, you can get some great natural brands at the local health food store. Noweven grocery stores carry them.
Science has proven that everything is made up of energy. In the Chinese art and science of Feng
Shui we call energy Chi. The Egyptians call it Ka, the Hebrew have Ruach, the Japanese have Ki,
Chi is condensed and dispersed in alternative cycles of positive (Sheng Chi) and negative (Sha
Chi) energy, and it manifests in various forms. Chi can not be destroyed; however, it can be
transformed. Energy can be blocked and build up negatively, or it can flow freely, which is what
we want in our homes. Feng Shui supports the energy flow in your environment, which directly
impacts the energy flow in your body and thus can unleash more of your energy and vitality.
As you read this article, realize that the magazine is comprised of particles of energy; the
computer you may be reading this on is exactly the same. The grass, the sun: it’s all energy.
Feng Shui translates to wind and water. When we consider the chi of water, we know we drink it,
wash with it, we cannot survive without it and we see this as positive energy. However a tsunami
can destroy an entire town. Wind is similar. It can feel amazing and caressing on a warm day. It
can be harnessed to create electricity. Yet too much wind can destroy cities. The key is balance.
In Feng Shui we differentiate three kinds of chi.
First we have heavenly chi, our destiny energy. This is the energy we are born with, the soul
agreements we have decided to have before we come into human form. Soul agreements are
made with your children, your lover, your mother and so on. When we bring Feng Shui into our
lives it does not change these pre-destined forces and experiences, but it makes what we would
perceive as a bad experiences less painful, more graceful.
Then there is human chi. This is your physical, emotional and mental chi. Feng Shui really
supports balance and alignment in your body, feelings and mind. Imagine living in a home that is
off-balance. You try self care, perhaps by seeing an acupunturist who brings your body into
balance. But when you return home to a cluttered and imbalanced environment you will likely
throw your body, mind and spirit out of alignment again.
Lastly we have earth chi. Earth chi includes mountains, water, the climate, and where we are
located in this earthly energy. Each of us is unique and has different needs; some people do well
in hot weather as others in cool. Feng Shui absolutely supports by connecting us with nature. We
spend 80% of our time inside our home or car or office and back again. Many of us have lost that
deep connection to Nature and the natural rhythms of the earth. Hundreds of years ago people
did not have clocks and calenders to tell them when to do things; they would just look up to the
sun and the moon and know when to plant their crops. They would speak to the land and
intuitively know what herbs would heal various ailments.
Feng Shui invites us to connect with Mother Earth, to commune with her, bring her elements
inside with plants, water fountains and crystals that harmonize our bodies and ground our enegy.
We are spiritual beings having human experiences and Feng Shui invites us to create a space
that connects the inside and the outside, bringing the colors of nature inside, soft browns, healing
greens and blues that remind us of nature’s abundant gifts.
Because you spend more than 80 percent of your time indoors, your home must be supportive and nurturing. When you enter your home, you should feel your spirits rise, for your home is the outward expression of your inner life. Your home should reflect the life you want to live.
Do you want to attract love?
Then dress the home as if you are already in a loving relationship.
The first step in Feng Shui is always to make your home clutter-free. To attract love, you should get rid of anything from past relationships—gifts, photos, love letters, anything with an old love’s energy on it. Otherwise you are holding on to that person. Let him or her go to free up your life for love.
2. Clear Out
Create an open space in your closet for a future partner’s things. Add eight empty hangers to say “I am welcoming you into my life. I have space and time for you.” Make room in your drawers, too, creating equal space for your belongings and your partner’s. Give unwanted items to someone who needs them, or to a charity, or to a recycling center, always honoring the earth as you decide where such things to go. Avoid giving clothing to friends, so you will be free of seeing your castaways and keeping that energy in your field.
3. Pair Up
Arrange bedroom items such as nightstands and lamps in pairs. Display artwork that suggests romance and intimacy. Anything that does not serve the bedroom’s function of offering rest and romance should be removed; this includes photos of friends and family.
4. Like with Like
Within those pairs, organize items of similar size; if one lamp on a nightstand is much larger than another, this will create an imbalance in the relationship. Whatever you do on one side of a pair, do the same on the other, even with nightlights and plants.
5. Give Electronics the Boot
Your bedroom is the key to creating a sacred home that welcomes the love of your life. Televisions or exercise paraphernalia do not belong there, and electronic equipment should be placed in your office. Such items in the bedroom make relationships appear to be about hard work, not about rest and romance.
6. Color Matters
Earth tones are soothing and grounding for attracting relationships. Then you might add small accents in the red spectrum, such as pinks, maroon, or berry. Try to create a room that is neither too feminine or too masculine. Find a nice balance so both persons will feel welcomed and honored in the space.
7. Bed Position
Assure yourself that you are supported in life and love. Your bed should be positioned so there is enough space to walk on either side. You should not sleep in line with the door but should see the door from your bed. It is best not to sleep under a window or have the bathroom on the other side of the headboard.
8. Size Matters
The size of your mattress is important! If you are single with a single mattress, you will stay single, while a King size mattress doesn’t encourage romance either. Queen size is perfect for love. It is best not to sleep on a mattress from a previous relationship; if you must, give it a clearing with some sage. Remove clutter from under the bed so energy can flow freely.
9. Remember the Rose Quartz
Rose quartz is the gem for love, compassion, healing and romance. Place two pieces on your nightstand; carry the gem in your purse or car. As jewelry, allow your gem to rest on your heart.
The southwest corner of your home is the area for love. Place two pieces of rose quartz or two peonies—the flowers for love and romance—in that area of your home
10. Start with Yourself
Treat yourself lovingly every day and do not wait for someone else to. Use your best bedding of satin or silk and wear your best underwear and nightgowns. Light your candles; buy yourself flowers. To attract love, you need to be, first of all, completely loving with yourself. Be in that vibration of love in order to receive it.
Boost your vision board with the power of Feng Shui.
The Vision Board is an amazing tool to help align you with your deepest wishes and to inspire love to manifest in your life. You can create this powerful tool from images, words and the concepts of Feng Shui to join the power of Feng Shui with the Law of attraction into one dynamic board. Before you begin, sit quietly to meditate and envision your goals and dreams. Be truly compassionate, loving and authentic with yourself during the process of creating this sacred board. Even the process itself will bring clarity about your intentions and your self-knowledge.
What you’ll need
- Cork board/poster board
- Magazines from travel, business, real estate, yoga
- Glue/sticky tape
- Computer and printer
Creating a vision board based on the Feng Shui principles
In Feng Shui, your home is divided into nine sectors called the Bagua Map. This map is an energy blueprint of your home and can be layered over your vision board to add more power to it. The map will boost the energy of each goal as you are directly relating it to the relevant life area. The areas of the Bagua begin at the top center section and move clockwise from there.
Creating your Bagua map
Top middle: Fame, recognition and how you share your light with the world
Upper right corner: Love/marriage, all relationships in your life
Mid right: Children, creativity, inner child and fertility
Lower right: Helpful people, travel, synchronicity
Lower middle: Career, life’s journey following your bliss
Lower left: Knowledge/self-cultivation, personal growth, meditative area, peace
Middle left hand: Family and community, deepening connection
Center: Health, unity and self-love
Upper Left corner: Wealth/prosperity and abundance
As you come out of your meditation, you are ready to create your board. Go through your magazines and tear out images that resonate with you. Your vision board might change as you are making it, so don’t become overly attached to certain images. Trust the divine process and know that what you attract is exactly what your soul needs for it evolution.
Add inspirational words specific to your goals. Words are very powerful; they turn ideas into action. The words should be written in the present tense and be positive. Have fun while creating your board. If specific pictures call to your imagination, search the Internet for the perfect image. When you feel deeply connected to your vision, your soul and your purpose, choose your favorite images and lay them on the board aligned with the your Bagua map. Eliminate any images that do not excite you. Add a beautiful, radiant picture of yourself to the center. As you create, feel your entire being open and align with your intentions.
Hang your vision board where you’ll see it everyday and allow the messages to go deeply into your subconscious. The wall across from your bed would be powerful placing as you’ll see your vision every morning and each night. Keep the board private from those entering your home, as you are planting seeds and until the roots are strong, it’s best to keep these tender shoots close to the heart and let the magic begin!
Amanda Collins will be teaching the Feng Shui Master Certification in Ireland in May 2014. internationalfengshuischool.com
Stay away from artificial or dried flowers, symbolize decay or lifelessness.
No cactus or thorny plants or flowers
Fill up the space with living plants, and fresh flowers. This will encourage good energy flow and give you a sense of balance and calmness.
Round-leafed plants encourage good energy and bring good fortune. Jade plants or money trees are particularly auspicious.
Money tree in the South east
Bamboo for good luck
Rose, Pink: Perfect happiness
Rose, Red: Love remove thorns
Rose, Red & White together: Unity
Tulip, Red: Declaration of love
Marriage: rose, lotus, orchid
Belles of Ireland: Good Luck
Calla: Magnificent beauty
Camelia, White: Perfect loveliness.
Chrysanthemum, Red: Love
Clover, four-leaf: Be mine.
Crocus: Youthful gladness
Creating a Loving Environment Through Feng Shui
Feng Shui is Yoga for the home.
Remove clutter. Eliminate the old to bring in the new.
When you get rid of clutter, you are making room for romance. If you are single, create an empty space in your closet for a future lover’s things. Make room in your drawers and closets so there is equal space for both you and your partner’s possessions. Remove items from past relationships.
Space Clear (please see notes on page
Past relationship photos and mementos. Eliminate the old to bring in the new.
If you have pictures of old boyfriends/girlfriends hanging around, then they’re still there! Get rid of the pictures and mementos.
If you have been previously married, make sure all items like old wedding rings and clothing from the wedding are not still in your possession.
Make sure that you have new sheets, too, to sleep on. Old energy can linger in the bed as well.
Keep the TV out of the bedroom. Any electronic equipment should be placed in the office or other area of the home. A TV in the bedroom is not conducive to romance. The bedroom is for lovin’ not working. Purge the room of all work-related materials that distract you.
No exercise equipment in the bedroom–makes your relationship exhausting.
It is not advised to work out in the bedroom because this represents hard work that is often a hindrance of romantic space.
Do not keep your altar in your bedroom; it is said to be disrespectful and prevent relationship and intimacy.
Mirrors in the bedroom. If they are facing the bed, relocate them because it reflects the couple on the bed. Some believe that this will cause a failure in the relationship because of the entry of a third party. Believe it or not, a television in the bedroom is just as negative as mirrors–do get rid of it.
Have things in pairs. Replace mismatched night tables with a set to encourage equality in your relationship. Mismatched night tables create an imbalance in the relationship.
Have a pair of lights show you want to share your life and home with your loved one.
Do not have just a single chair in the bedroom; have a pair of chairs or a love seat in the bedroom.
No sharp corners in the bedroom from furniture or statues.
Add a book on love and Romance to your night stand.
Check the statues and art in your bedroom. Replace any photos, sculptures or art of single people or figures. Replace them with happy couples. This simple change will help draw a wonderful partner! Discard or put away photos and mementos of old flames. Gifts and anything with the former partner’s energy on it keeps new love at bay.
If there are any abstract, dark or sad pieces of artwork in the bedroom, remove them. These things encourage negativity when, alternatively, the bedroom should be peaceful and safe for those who sleep there. You can replace it with a painting of peonies flowers, love birds or silk flowers as these represents love.
Personal photos. Do not display family and children’s’ photos in the bedroom. This is said to hinder your sex life. Put such photos in the living or family room where they belong!
Adjust light levels in your bedroom with the help of a dimmer. This is very important, as light is one of the most powerful manifestations of energy. Toxin free candles are recommended as the best option for bedroom lighting.
Set the mood. The mood in the bedroom is important, too, e.g., light scented candles, drape your lamps in sheer fabrics or lace. Keep lighting soft. Play romantic music. Place “happy” photos of you and your honey on the dresser.
The bedroom should be well ventilated so old energy moves out of the room.
Keep all doors closed during night. It might be your bedroom door, the door of your closet, your bathroom door, etc. This will ensure the optimum flow of nourishing and healing energy and will improve your health and strengthen your relationship.
Should the bedroom door squeak, fix it because it blocks romantic energy from entering the bedroom.
Make sure door knobs are not loose; this can cause you not to have a firm grip on life.
Make sure the faucets are not dripping; leaky faucets indicate a loss of energy; blocked toilets can represent blocked emotions.
The size of your bed matters!
If you are single, a single mattress is not a good idea. In addition, snoozing on either a king size or single mattress doesn’t encourage romance. Sleeping on a huge mattress does not encourage intimacy. Invest in a full size or a queen.
Store nothing under the bed, and keep it clean. Whether you have dust bunnies or Christmas ornaments stored under the bed, Feng Shui believes that objects below the bed can cause restless sleep. Storing items under your bed affects your sleep. If space/storage is at a premium, linens are the only items acceptable for storage under the bed.
Store your laundry elsewhere. Whether the laundry is dirty or simply not folded and put away, it should not be lying around the bedroom. This kind of mundane imagery is not conducive to rest or romance.
Bed placement. Having the side of your bed up against a wall pushes away your chance for love. Have your bed positioned so there is enough space to walk on either side. Bed is not to be in line with the door; instead, you should be able to see the door as you lay in the bed. Do not have your headboard up against the toilet wall or under a window.
Satin sheets. Think of sensual, soft, bedding when selecting pillows, sheets and comforters. Any type of bedding that creates a cozy environment is great for the bedroom.
Solid Wooden headboard is best for goods nights sleep. Metal headboards are not recommended.
Decorate it in a gender-neutral manner (no fussy flowers and pastels or severely macho/masculine rooms). Make sure the bedroom is not too Yin (feminine) or Yang (masculine). This will either deter the man or woman; he/she will not feel comfortable.
Decorate your room in the right color. Shades of pink or earth tones helps draw love to you easily and create a romantic mood. Red, used sparingly, can be a sexy, bold color that creates passion or help draw a new lover.
Rose quartz or green quartz. Buy chunks of rose quartz, rose quartz hearts, and also rose quartz lamps and place them in your bedroom. Rose quartz is known to draw love into your life, increase self love and help heal a broken heart. Always have the rose quartz’s in pairs
Rose Quartz. Rose Quartz is the most desirable of all quartz and is associated with love, romance and relationships. Widely known as the ‘Love Stone’, Rose Quartz is most favored for its ability in speeding up the process for those seeking true love, mending broken relationships and jazzing up your existing romance life. Rose quartz is also reputed to help with the comprehension of love, restores the love of self as well as love for others, and heals old emotional wounds while developing self-appreciation and love. Wear rose quartz earrings, necklaces or carry a couple of stones in your pockets, purse or have in your car.
Add a statue or picture Ganesh outside the bedroom door to remove any obstacles to partnership/romance.
Add a picture or statue of Kwan Yin, the Goddess or love and compassion, as you enter the bedroom. Do not have her facing the bed, however.
Use a magic box. This is said to draw a spouse to you. Write your deepest desires for a loved one on a piece of paper. Place this box in the SW corner of the house, in a cupboard or out of sight.
Treat yourselves to fresh flowers and once they wilt, replace them.
Remove dried flowers or cactus from the house. They are especially detrimental by the front door and bedroom.
Move out the stuffed animals, dolls, and excessive pillows from the bed to make room for your lover.
Remove anything fragile. If anything in your room triggers anxiety when someone clumsy visits, change your bedroom decor. There should be nothing in your bedroom that contribute
es to stress–even for a fleeting moment–and that makes you reluctant to welcome guests into every room in your home.
Rainbows for love. Hang a crystal in the South West windows. Then, let the suns rays shine on the crystal to create rainbows in the South West sector of your house for extra romantic energy in your space.
The South West area of your home and any room is associated with love; make sure the area is clean/clutter free and spruce that area up with something that represents love.
To activate the South West areas of your space, try these suggestions:
• Place a beautiful stone (such as rose quartz) or a beautiful vase in the SW corner of your desk.
• Add red items or red crystal paperweight is also a perfect addition.
Home/Living Room: Make sure the South West sectors of your home and living room have love objects appropriate to the South West corner.
Garden: Place a statue of a couple in the South West location, or plant some red or pink flowers here.
If the South West corner has a toilet, make sure this room has a mirror in it. Keep the door closed.
Write a letter to your soul mate, making sure it is all written in the positive and in present tense (see page 1).
Dress with Intention for love
Fire up your wardrobe to fire up your love life.
In Feng Shui, the life forming element of Fire represents intimacy and passion. Fire energy manifests on the physical plane as the colors red and purple, light or life-based substances, such as shiny or animal-skin fabrics, and the triangle shape, v-necklines, peaked lapels and diamond patterns. Ignite your personal style (and someone’s passion) by incorporating a Fire design element into your ensemble every day.
Wear the love colors of pink, red or green for the heart chakra
Bring items into your space, for example:
Mandarin Ducks. A pair of Mandarin Ducks symbolize happiness in love and suggestive of romance, devotion, affection, conjugal fidelity, togetherness and enduring love. For singles, the pair of Mandarin Ducks will enhance your chances of finding love partners; for lovers, it will bring you marriage opportunities; and for married couples, a pair of Mandarin Ducks will hold out the promise of a marriage being gloriously happy with no separation between the spouses.
Peony Flower. The Queen of all flowers and the national flower of China, the peony or ‘Mou Tan’ is also known as the ‘Flower of Riches and Honor’ in Chinese. The peony is the emblem of love and affection, feminine beauty and the amorous feelings of youth. Peonies are often referred to in romantic Chinese poetry and literature. In Feng Shui, the Peony is used to attract romance luck.
Bring pictures or energy of animals that mate for life, for example:
Wolves, Swans, coyotes, barn owls, beavers, bald eagles, golden eagles, condors, cranes, French angel fish, sandhill cranes, pigeons, prions (a seabird), red-tailed hawks, anglerfish, ospreys
Essential Oils for Love
Rose oil ~ Used to open the heart and gets the emotions flowing, which puts you in the mood for romance. Rose is the main scent representing and encouraging love.
Other good essential oils to use:
• Jasmine oil ~ stimulates the sexual appetite.
• Sandalwood oil ~ relaxes the nervous system while awakening desire.
• Ylang Ylang ~ has very strong aphrodisiac properties.